


A Movie About a Horse

by Violetwilson



Category: Dream Horse
Genre: Other, rated E for "equestrians"
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-19
Updated: 2020-02-19
Packaged: 2021-02-27 23:48:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22804348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Violetwilson/pseuds/Violetwilson
Summary: I watched the trailer for Dream Horse one (1) time and wrote this fanfic about it. Go, Horse!
Relationships: Town/Hope, horse/the big race, toni collette/oscar
Comments: 15
Kudos: 36





	A Movie About a Horse

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Toni Collett](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Toni+Collett).



Toni Collette is an Irish grocer named Jan who is sick of being hopeless and horseless in the small Irish town where she lives. There's no amount of Irish Spring soap and wool sweaters that can fill a racehorse-shaped hole in a community, and after one too many nights not-having-a-racehorse, Toni decides to do something about it.

"We can't have a racehorse," says the Rich Guy Who Knows About These Things. "There's no way it will work!" 

Toni Collette slams her fist down onto the table in an Irish kind of way. "This is bigger than our small town. Big as a horse!"

"Yes," say the townspeople, slamming money into a jar labeled "horse." 

And then one day, there's a horse fetus! Did you know that horse fetuses look like lizards? Toni Collette does. 

"Yes!" says Toni Collette emotively. "I will race this horse!" 

* * *

  
But when the horse is born and grows up a little bit (they named the horse Dream Collective after a shared communist fever dream the townspeople fell into one night while waxing rhapsodic about Horse Stuff), it turns out that this whole Horse Thing might not be so easy. 

"I don't think that Horse will be able to win," says the sensible man with the beard.

"Hmmm," says everyone.

Toni Collette has a hard think about it and gives the Horse a stern but encouraging gaze in that "this small Irish town needs this boost" sort of way, you know the one.

"If I, Toni Collette, am in this movie, then this horse can do it," she says. When the Horse begins to run, the audience lets out a sigh of relief, because maybe this cooky co-op horse movie will have a happy ending after all!

Finally, it's the day of the Big Race. Unfortunately, something happens to The Horse! 

"We can't give up now," says Tony Collette, stirringly. "We named the Horse Dream because this is our dream."

The man with the beard nods sagely. "Sometimes dreams don't come true."

"Yes but in this case they will because I'm Irish and Toni Collette" says Toni Collette, looking right at the camera, "And this movie is based on a True Horse Story."

Unfortunately, the horse has an injury (probably) and things couldn't be _worse_. Will the Horse even make it? Someone (that one guy who we HATE) says they should put the horse down. 

"No," decides everyone, but only after there's a thick silence where they all kind of consider the idea of killing the horse now that he can't make them any money. 

Well, boy do the townsfolk have a tricky go of it to get things back on the rails. There's a moment, about 80% of the way into the movie where things really seem pretty bad. Maybe The Horse Can't Ride Now? 

Luckily, there's a solution. It's risky, but it just might work. 

"That was a close one," says The Horse, now recovering nicely in a stall. 

"Do you think the Horse can race At The Even Bigger Big Race?" Says the teenage boy who represents the economic future of the town.

"I'm going to go look out over a field about this," says Toni Collette.

* * *

  
The go to the even bigger race, emotionally raw from their previous loss at the Big Race.

"This is our last shot," threatens the man with the beard. 

"You can do it, Dream Horse," says everyone, as the race starts. 

When Dream Horse wins, the Horse looks right at the camera and says, "A return to pastoral agrarianism is impossible, the workers must unite to overthrow the upper classes. Eat the rich. I'm a fucking horse."

The movie ends. In big bold letters, we see the credits. 

_**TONI COLLETTE** _

**Author's Note:**

> [I LOVE HORSE!!!!](https://twitter.com/ViWiWrites/status/1230197896890458115)
> 
> [Follow Dream Horse on Twitter!!!!!](https://twitter.com/DreamHorseMovie)


End file.
